I absolutely 100% never give myself enough time in the mornings, never have time for breakfast and normally pile out of the house about 5 minutes before I’m due to start work at 9am – my 1 job in the morning is to nip the dogs out for 10 minutes, they’re both getting a bit older so need regular exercise therefore this is really important for them. Literally all I have to do is pull some clothes on and briskly walk them around the estate where I live, not a major deal, no messing around, doesn’t take long. I didn’t have time this morning, the wife was not happy! It’s safe to say I’m not a morning person. Me getting out of bed in the morning is like Stevie Wonder picking his own clothes for the day, it’s long, painful and a ridiculous sight, but there is actually a point to it.
Back to my commute, I actually left the house at 8:57am knowing full well my journey can only be done at full speed in 12 minutes. I duly hit the dual carriageway which takes me all the way to my office and punched my 3 year old Ford engine all the way up to 90mph, thinking somehow I could get there in 3 minutes with my Lewis Hamilton head on. I turned the corner into our industrial estate, hung round the bend into our car park and slammed my motor into the first available space – unfortunately under what seems like an aviary due to the amount of birdshit you get if you park under these particular trees – but I didn’t care, I was making it this time. I burst through our reception doors to the clocking in tablet on the wall (very 21st century) and noticed the time was 9:10am. I didn’t make it. I failed. BUT, my boss is on holiday this week…so I didn’t bother clocking in…BONUS!
The most exciting part of my morning today was getting my daily can of a certain energy drink out of the vending machine and guess what…2 dropped out, I genuinely could not believe my luck, it was like the vending machine Gods were looking down at me saying, “This guy needs as much help as possible, look at the state of him”!
After the obligatory 59 “mornings” as I made my way across our whole office, I took my place at my desk under the eternal barrage of the air con unit. Thought about logging on but instead got my phone out and checked Facebook. Holy Shit, someone I vaguely know had checked in at the doctor’s an hour ago, obviously fishing for sympathy, nobody had commented. Good. Enough of Social Media for half an hour or so, I logged on and half heartedly checked my email. Nothing that needs doing instantly. Time to find something to do…Uh oh. J